Bonnie's Baskets
During my final weeks of pregnancy,
I began mulling over some options for what I could do at home while on maternity leave. I had no idea how I might feel postpartum, so being able to reach for something I could make with my hands felt like a grounding plan in case I was having a hard time with all the change.
It occurred to me that it could be fun (and not too messy) to try out printmaking. Carving out an image at home to later be printed sounded both exciting and maybe even a little necessary if I needed some gentle coercing back into the studio.
The first and last time I tried printmaking was in high school. My art teacher handed everyone pink foam rectangles and a few toothpicks and explained the printmaking process. I remember having two predominant thoughts:
First off, none of this made sense! Art class was always “easy”, but in this moment I had no idea what I was doing.
And secondly, I remember being disappointed in the foam and toothpicks.
All things considered, it felt right to give printmaking another shot. This time with better materials and in the midst of a learning curve so steep, why not add to the chaos, the pliability that would likely be my brain as I walked this pathway into motherhood. I went shopping for all the printmaking essentials and nestled my supplies in a box to bring with me on the postpartum journey.
Fast forward to December 20th.
Bonnie Patton Monteverde was born into our world and we got to feel her precious being in our arms for the first time!
Of the many new things I experienced postpartum was the immediate loss of my hands. If not full of Bonnie in the very best way, I was using my hands to eat and shower - or I wasn’t using them at all because I was catching up on sleep. The box of printmaking supplies were there if I needed them and I had the rest of my life to carve if I didn't need them yet.
On a cloudy afternoon in January,
while I had a few hours by myself at home with Bonnie, I got brave enough to attempt putting her in my Solly wrap. As I wrapped and weaved and upheld her into the fabric around me, the freedom I felt in gaining back the use of my hands was significant.
I waltzed around the house doing dishes, lighting candles, playing the piano, and just feeling the emptiness in my hands as I pat her sweet sleepy bum snuggled close to me. I may have the capacity of using my hands for art again - maybe even soon!
The next few weeks while Bonnie napped in the wrap or bassinet or on her father’s chest, I carved a simple still life of a familiar subject in an unfamiliar medium in a pliable moment in our lives. During these pockets of time, I practiced training my eyes to see in a different way and process through something with newness and curiosity.
There was a bit of synchronicity
as I learned of Bonnie’s current development of what she could and couldn’t see. We had been gifted art cards from thoughtful friends (thanks Burt and Hannah!) and they quickly became her favorite things to stare at.
I studied the high contrast black and white images alongside her, focusing on the lightest lights and darkest darks running parallel to the highest highs and lowest lows that had accompanied us those first few weeks of bringing this fragile baby into our home.
The invisible moments guiding me towards this very present moment of creating art that Bonnie could process visually affirmed me both as a mother and artist trying to trust her gut and believe in her heart that God simply knows exactly what He is doing all the time.
I hope I can remember to get down on her level often, gazing at the world from her valuable viewpoint. But when I inevitably forget, I pray this block print will stop me in my busyness to see all that she is unfolding to be right before my eyes. I know she will teach me so much.
These are for you, Bonnie!
Bonnie’s Baskets is a 6x4” linocut carving printed with black ink, centered on 10x8” 140LB acid free paper. Each print is hand-inked resulting in unique nuances, signed, numbered, and titled. Edition of 20.
